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March 11, 2008

Do the Dishes and Get Laid

Maybe you've heard that Stats Can has released a study that shows that some men are doing more housework and as a result they're getting laid more. All I have to say about that is were they in a gay bar when they did the survey?

If you happened to catch that pathetic TV Show on CBC called The Week the Women Went, in which they took a little town in Alberta and they put all the women on buses for a luxury week in Banff while the men had to deal with the kids and the house, it was pretty clear that only one of the men, maybe two, even knew where the dishwasher or the washing machine was let alone how to turn them on. The really sad part was how few of them were actually interacting with their children in a way that isn't going to damage them for life. But that's another story. And, clearly, what this study is suggesting is that if you can't turn on the dishwasher that's not the only gadget you won't be turnin' on.

Doesn't that seem weird to you? They can rebuild an engine but they can't turn on the dishwasher? They can create a robotic space arm but they don't know how to find the brush that cleans the toilet? Maybe the robotic space arm was actually designed solely by women. We should check on that.

Now, I personally couldn't care a less because I don't have any men in my house. I mess it up all by myself. I clean it up all by myself. When I have to. When company's coming. Maybe. That how it works in my "How to stay single forever" reality. Housework to me ranks right up there on the interest scale with, let's say, curling!

And, interestingly enough, the two men I've lived with for any significant length of time have been really good at cooking and at housework. Perhaps it's an inverse correlation directly related to how good the woman is at those.

In 2006, 87.9 per cent of men said they did housework, up from 84.4 per cent in 1996. Say that again. Eighty-seven percent? I'm sorry but when I look at people I know, who live with husbands or live-in boyfriends, I really don't get the feeling that that number is accurate.

Did they give them a definition of what housework is before they asked the question? Taking the empties from the TV room to the kitchen counter, did that count?

The only thing I liked about the study is that it shows that if you don't treat someone else like your personal slave, then, yes, it's probably likely that you're going to have a relationship that's more affectionate than if you are still acting like a child wondering when mom's coming home to cater to your every whim. Although, I question that even as I write it given so many of the realities I've witnessed.

Then again, it was dear old mom, and her refusal to teach her son (and to be fair, her daughters) how to do anything around the house that created the monster in the first place.

It's always mom's fault isn't it?

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